Sunday, September 9, 2018

I am

The words “I am” have continued to roll around in my head for several days now. Apparently, I have commenced another walkabout. This particular walkabout began as I watched and listened to a well known conservative spokesman on television. During that program, he spoke a two word sentence that resonated deep within me. The sentence was “I am”. For some reason, which is still not clear, what he said after that did not seem to matter. His voice faded to silence in my head and I turned off the television and turned inward in search of those two words.

Almost immediately I recalled a quotation that ended with those same two words. The Rene Descartes quotation “I think, therefore I am” seemed to be a path to follow and I began to walk. Any further exploration of Descartes is not in the cards for this essay. However, I encourage you to take some time to explore a little of his life and works to remind yourself of what you already know or discover him for the first time.

My daughter listened carefully when I told her I was busy thinking about ‘I am’. She quickly gave me four suggestions and because she has a degree in comparative religion and has published many books, I listened too. Her first suggestion was to read Impermanence and Love written by Elias Amidon. He is an author and has been a student of Sufism for over 40 years. Join me here in watching an image he clearly described. A child runs to “her mother’s waiting arms” and you view the shared communication of parent child love and then you watch as the child returned to what children do. The author, a new name to me, then continued with “That was many years ago. Now the child no longer exists; a grown up person has taken her place. The mother child image no longer exists because the mother also no longer exists.” What happened to the child and mother can be explained in a single word and I will make it a point to remember it clearly. The word is impermanence. Look closely and you will see that “Each moment yields to the next and never returns.” This is impermanence. Impermanence often brings us sadness and a void. It can also be a path to joy. My past image of ‘I am’ has moved forward and yet it can be remembered and experienced even as my future ‘I am’ appears near. You and I can experience what we all recognize as love as it connects us to a reality which no longer exists. Try it out. Let us continue this walkabout together. Presume your parents are no longer alive (mine are not). Simply state I am the son/daughter of (insert the first and last names of your parents). Now then, you do sense their presence and their humanness. Don’t you? Given time you will also recall the existence of many other things that are gone but still remain real and present. So where are they? I really like the idea that they have become part of a whole and they are what we will become.

Her second suggestion was to create a self ‘I am’ list as long as I could and then cross off any of the roles I have played and identities I have given to myself and those given to me by family, society, faith tradition or nationality. Her point was none of the labels answer the question of Who am I? Why? It is because the answer itself is not verbal but a felt sense in your heart center. Anything that can be said about my ‘I am’ is merely symbolic.” Her third suggestion pointed me in the direction of jnana yoga. (See location 1 below) This branch of yoga focuses on using the mind to transcend the mind. Lastly, she introduced me to a past master of self-inquiry named Ramana Maharshi. It was in the words of a brief Maharshi biography See (location 2 below) that I found my walkabout affirmed. “Being is something that all humans share with the creator or ultimate reality.” Remember this and who said it? “I am that I am.” “Being is primary.”

I learned something new at each and every suggested guidepost. Each was worth the visit and I finished this walkabout comfortable and refreshed.

Now would be a good time for you to begin and enjoy your own ‘I am’ walkabout.

2: http://www.om-guru.com/html/saints/maharshi.html

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